Blessing: The place for grace, to learn to trust!

“You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings.” 

            ― Elizabeth Gilbert

   20 years ago, at a camp for people with disabilities in northern Minnesota, my camper David, brought me to meet God in a new way, and showed me my need for more of Him and less of me. That night in the camp chapel, alone with David and God, my life was changed forever. It was the beginning of the journey of understanding just what it means to have more of God and less of me, this gift is His Blessing. 

   To learn to be accepting of Gods provision to teach me to be humble and to depend on His way of molding and shaping me, has been a fight to say the least. One of the hardest fought lessons has been to trust. Trusting God for real, is hard, trusting people feels almost impossible at times, and trusting my self has been practically impossible for most of my life. But even with the struggle, God has been faithful to drag me through, sometimes kicking and screaming. One thing that has helped has been that God poured out a blessing on me while I stood in His presence with David. He showed me things I needed to know would come, in order to keep me moving forward. Things He knew would keep me alert to His purpose , and help me relentlessly move towards His voice, though most of the time I cannot see at all.

   I believe with all of my heart that God has destined each of us with a purpose. He has given us gifts, strengths and weaknesses, that He uses to help us move towards Him and His plans for our lives. Gods blessings to us are typically to help us to have the strength and courage to carry out His purpose in our lives. Over the last few years God has been teaching me much about His blessing. He has taken me down paths I would never journey down on my own, he has shown me mountain peaks that have proven His leading and valleys that have allowed me to prove that I would be led. 20 years ago God showed me things He wanted me to see, and it was a blessing, because it pointed me in the direction He wanted me to go, and showed me I could not go on the journey alone. Through the years He has consistently reminded me He has many more blessings ahead and that He would prepare me for those. 

   So I have thought, prayed and studied blessing. I have asked for blessings, I have even grabbed on to Him and demanded blessing like Jacob did. In the end God seemed to laugh and say, "OK , you want these blessings, than you need to be prepared for them". So, as I have moved through life I have encountered many things that have seemed to be negative, but proved to be positive by their end. Last week many of you walked through some scary days with us, as Karol's health came into question. For many days it seemed that cancer may be looming and that we may be in for a long battle. In the end God showed us that He loved us and had lined up hundreds of His people to love us to. In the process I was once again brought to my knees, not willingly, as in bowing to pray to the king, but doubled over in fear and pain, unable to stand on my own. Eventually, through His mercy, I was able to be on my knees in prayer, asking for direction, asking for courage, and in thanks for His outpouring of love and the plain sight of it. 

   As this period of fear has come to an end, He reminded me once again, that he was providing the perspective needed for the coming journey...from my knees! He is preparing me again for His blessing. He reminded me that in His old testament, a blessing was received while on ones knees. One of the Hebrew roots for the word blessing is literally, knee. Our knees are actually one of weakest point in our bodies, as I found out firsthand only months ago as the doctor repaired the tendon in my knee that was torn off and I was unable to stand or walk. You have heard the term "weak in the knees" referring to being overcome with emotion, shook, feeling like you could fall down to your knees. I felt like this many times in the last week as the prospect of a major health issues threatened Karol. So I move ahead from this time looking back with thanks for the answer to hundreds of prayers Karol received.  God has showed us again He has a purpose in everything, He has brought us to our knees to receive that blessing, a blessing that is the very gift of Hs power to do what is impossible to us, but possible because of Him. He has shown His love to us through so many of His people, that is empowerment, that is His plan, that is His blessing, love is ultimate weapon in the war on sin, against flesh and the devil himself.

   God I thank you for the painful situations that knock us to our knees and for being right there to scoop  us up into your arms from that humble place. I am sorry for my lack of trust in you and your purpose. I again ask for your grace, to trust you more.

Knot Hole Vision

Many of you who read this may not know that I am getting prepared for a missions trip to Kenya, Africa. Tim and Chrissy have been taking teams to Africa for the last ten years working with friends from their days at Bethany College of Missions in Minnesota, who are full time missionaries in Kenya. This trip is to build a girls school where there is no school for girls, in an area where there are few Christians. If you have interest in learning more, I would invite you to our blog about the missions we are involved in at

www.lhcmissions.blogspot.com.

We leave June 10th and will be gone over two weeks. If you can help me financially please email me and will send you out a support card. If you will pray for me during this time please email that you would commit to that.

tony@campdaniel.org

I am getting a consistent question...Why do you want to go to Africa? Don't you have enough to do? The answer is yes, I have enough to do, but more importantly the answer is that I believe this trip will help me grow; closer to God, farther from my "American" candy coated life, and as a servant, a minister and leader. I go on this trip not necessarily feeling "called" but I don't particularly believe that has much to do with anything but my main life's pursuit. Biblically, it says to "Go" so I will. It is hard for others from the outside to see how this lines up in the vision God has given us for Camp Daniel, but it does. My Uncle Jerry taught me many years ago that God always cares more about our relationship with Him than the ministry we are in. It is that basis in which much of the ministry has happened at Camp Daniel. As the servants who carry out the ministry grow, so does the ministry grow. So this trip is vital to the future of Camp Daniel and our growth.

Sue Koch taught taught me a simple yet very profound concept some years ago. It goes like this; Life is like watching a baseball game... through a knot hole in a fence. The game is going on and God is seeing it all, yet we can only see the narrow sight line through that hole. At some point in the game we may see a batter hit the ball up in the air, and a fielder catch it. We may have disappointment because he got out. But what we missed was the go ahead run scoring as it was a sacrifice fly. This has been so profound to me that I have based allot of my leadership on the concept, I am only seeing from my point of view, not God's. So a big part of what I have tried to do is enlarge the knot hole in order to have a wider sight line. That is what this missions trip is all about, enlarging the knot hole to see a broader perspective to change me, the ministry I am involved in, and the way I lead, by seeing from a perspective just a little closer to heavens.

I know that we never see the entire game while here on earth, and that will make it hard to do things right. Yet, I also know God is constantly giving us opportunity to see things from His perspective, we must be willing to look. They are simply glimpses, but they are life changing every time they happen. So I go to Africa knowing I will get a glimpse of what God wants me to see, and that is exciting, yet I go humbly and with a little fear as I know that these glimpses cause us to grow and growth can hurt! So I ask for your prayer as I continue to cut at that knot hole to make it bigger.

What a Day It will Be!

In Alice in Wonderland, Alice gets to a fork in the road and she asks the cat. "Which way do I go?" "Where are you going?," asks the cat. "I don't know." "Then it really doesn't make any difference which way you go," replies the cat.

White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel recently used the word retarded and the backlash was swift and typical. He apologized to the Special Olympic President, and the movement to end the use of "R" word was hailed by all as the way to bring everyone together in a hands across America moment of solidarity. Almost a year ago we had the duplicate type of reaction which began with President Obama referring to his bad bowling as "Special Olympic". This unfortunate use of the word retarded has allowed me to step back and realize that nothing has changed in the last year for people with mental disabilities. Bad attitudes and beliefs that there is no value in those who have disabilities is what truly is behind ignorant words that people use. In fact things may be a little harder in America today than one year ago for most. Funding has been slashed for many, the health care debate continues to put those with disabilities in precarious positions, and babies who may be born with disabilities continue to be aborted. As politicians use their own ignorance and mistakes as platforms for engineering campaigns for popularity, people with disabilities are being crushed into oblivion.

I recently was blessed to spend much time with disability ministry leaders from across the US while in Florida. To hear about how others are going about reaching the disabled community for Jesus is exciting and inspiring. Yet, I come away feeling like we are walking down a winding path to no where. We seem to have little idea where we want be at the end of the journey. We applaud the good reactions to ignorant statements made by politicians and others who do little to protect the innocent who need protecting. We get excited when "inspirational" people with disabilities accomplish fetes that move our emotions, and we cry tears of pain for the millions who are ignored, marginalized, and killed for having disabilities.

I am unsatisfied with our reactions to these moments. I am angered at our inability for 2000 years to convince the church of the need to complete the body by including those so desperately needed in it. I am devastated at the genocide of people with disabilities here in the US and through out the world. I am ashamed at the lack of love for people Jesus loved so dearly. I am sickened by our acceptance of the crumbs that drop from the tables of the typical church while people starve.

We need to wake up, we are at a point in history where we must fight, we are at a fork in the road and must know where we are going in order to decide which way to turn today. It does matter which way we go because we need to be together on the path in order to get to our appointed destination. We must begin casting vision to the future so we can walk the path in confidence and determination. We must paint a picture so amazing and beautiful that the existing church cannot deny the need to move towards it. We must unify the church in order that the world does not take from us the gift of disability that God has given us. We must be so sure of our calling, we must be willing to risk everything in pursuit of Gods voice. I am ready Lord, I am ready...

So as I begin to ponder what God has in store, I look forward to a future where people with disabilities complete our church bodies and the church finally works as the whole and powerful force that it should be. I look forward to a day when the birth of a baby with Down Syndrome is celebrated as a the rare and precious gift God has bestowed upon our families. I look forward to church services where people with disabilities gifts are on display so God's glory can be revealed to us in ways we never understood before. I look forward to the outpouring of the Holy Spirit which cannot be denied because God has used people without the mental capacity to manipulate or use Gods gift as an agenda to advance themselves. I look forward to walking into the gates of heaven and seeing Paul and Moses and then touching the disabling scars on Jesuses hands and feet as I truly understand for the first time that the last is now first and the poor now rich. What a day that will be!